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Thursday, August 7, 2008

Getting to Know Us...

5 Things You Should Know About Jill (according to Jill)

  1. Blond (literally).
  2. Believes that "being on time" is highly overrated, kind of like "paying attention", and "showering regularly".
  3. Used to think that squirrels lived inside hollow trees, despite the fact that there are very few hollow trees around. Feels as though animated TV led her astray by portraying rodents living in tiny human-like houses inside trees.
  4. Enjoys planning every last detail of everything under the sun. Spreadsheets are her best friend (and that's only because they can't protest, really). Worries constantly that "things might not go according to plan". This would obviously be disastrous.
  5. Enjoyed playing "House", "Adoption Agency", and "Veterinarian" as a child. Also enjoyed putting on plays about the evils of smoking in an effort to get her elders to stop smoking. Still feels personally responsible for that failure - acting has never been her strong suit.

5 Things You Should Know About Jill (according to Jack)

  1. She’s vegan. And when she’s hungry, she acts like a starving raccoon in an alley full of empty trash cans. Who was just left by her husband for a young squirrel. And who has PMS. In other words, Jill gets kinda surly when she’s hungry.
  2. Has the worst memory known to man.
  3. Loves her dog. And by “love” I mean if she had to feed either me or her dog to a pack of wolves, the name of this blog would soon be changed to Spot & Jill.
  4. Constantly has the sniffles. Either used to snort cocaine or she’s allergic to cat hair, dog hair, dust, air, sunlight, and water.
  5. Secretly wishes she was a professional dancer. Actually, it’s not a secret at all. Often spends three hours a night watching “So You Think You Can Dance” episodes in slow motion.

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5 Things You Should Know About Jack (according to Jack)

  1. Momma’s boy.
  2. Has an irrational fear that his windshield is going to be shattered by the pressure from the auto-dryer each time he gets his car washed. He’s also scared of elevators, swimming in open bodies of water, and guys who wear jean shorts. But who isn’t?
  3. Owns 61 pairs of sneakers.
  4. Considers himself to be the best driver in the world. Literally.
  5. Has an unnatural obsession with all things peanut butter. Peanut butter & jelly. Peanut butter & crackers. Peanut butter & a spoon. Peanut butter cookies. Peanut butter brownies. Peanut butter sushi.


5 Things You Should Know About Jack (according to Jill)

  1. Doesn't just own 61 pairs of sneakers, but proudly displays them as though they are awards won for something like Curing Cancer or Saving Orphans From Blazing Fires. Some pairs are even too special to wear. And should you step on one of his feet whilst he's wearing these precious sneakers, beware - you might just lose your foot. Let me put it this way: if his favorite pair of shoes could type, this blog would quickly be renamed "Jack and His Supras".
  2. Is unnaturally attached to his Blackberry. (More on that later, I assure you.)
  3. Likes to push my buttons. Has an unnatural talent for quickly identifying what will drive me most insane and then skillfully deploys tactics that will do this in the most effective manner.
  4. Lives in a high rise building despite apparent fear of elevators (???).
  5. Is metrosexual but refuses to admit it.

10 comments:

surviving myself said...

I love it.

Becky said...

My god you two are perfect for each other.

JenBun said...

This is the BEST idea for a blog!

And I'm not sure this was the point of this post, but I kind of want to marry you now. Both of you.

I think it may have been the puppy love and the dancing and the peanut butter and the SHOES!!!

Jack and Jill said...

Surviving Myself - Why, thank you!

Becky - Keep reading, you might change your mind. :-)

Jenbun - Thanks!! And we'll totally marry you. Let's move to Utah!

JenBun said...

Utah it is! I'm totally down.

Except Jill gets to be in charge! ;)

Victoria said...

They DO live in hollow trees. THEY DO!
Squirrels I mean. They do. They must!

Um, also, I too wanna be a professional dancer and am in love with SYTYCD.

adorablybitter said...

Hahahaha!
And one fine day, when you too are away from home for too long, a competing blog will show up - Spot and the Supras.

Hmm, actually it sounds like a good rock band name.

Cayman's Girl said...

HA HA HA HILARIOUS I LOVE IT!!!

The Pretty Brown Girl said...

I just discovered your blog this weekend, thanks to the Awesomely Luvvie. I like it! :)

Devyl Gyrl said...

I have no idea when I first discovered your blog and added you to my feeder. I am fairly certain that I read one of your "Take Two" posts at the time, because that is the one that sounded familiar as I was reading posts today.

I opened my reader for the first time in about a year today, and started reading various blogs, catching up with friends. Then, I ran across an unfamiliar blog name: Jack and Jill Online.

Curious, I began reading. And laughing. I laughed so much, I wrote a "pimp post" about you, that will post on my blog in a few days. I hope you do not mind. If you do, email me and I will put a stop to it ... but I just felt the need to share your hilarity with my friends.

I do not have a huge following, so do not expect to be bombarded. I am sure, though, my two or three blog readers will love your blog and feel the need to nose around, just a little bit (especially since I posted links to some of the posts that made me LOL.)

Thanks for the fun evening.