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Thursday, July 16, 2009

Jill's Brilliant Blog Idea

So, I have this great idea for a blog, but there is no way I could possibly follow through on it, because I am too easily embarrassed. If anyone else wants to do it, by all means go ahead, and then give me the URL.

I was thinking it would be really funny to do the following: I'd create a totally normal Match.com profile. I'd schedule dates with unsuspecting lads via emails that were also totally normal (or "normal" by my definition, which Jack would say is anything but normal, but whatever). Then I'd show up with the goal of being the strangest date that guy has ever had. Maybe I'd wear moose ears and speak completely monotone; maybe I'd tell him at the outset that I have narcolepsy and then "fall asleep" every 5 minutes for a few minutes; maybe I'd dress up like a clown and make balloon animals for him. My favorite, though, would be much simpler than that: I'd bring a note pad on the date and start asking him standard first date questions. As he answered, I'd write down everything he said and then make commentary under my breath: "Likes to work out....can't really tell by looking at him though", "not close to family...RED FLAG", "likes to hang out with friends in free time....I question if these 'friends' really exist" - you know, insulting stuff like that. Then I'd blog about each date's reaction to my nuttiness. I think it would be absolutely fantastic - if I could actually pull it off.

I brought this idea up to Jack, and to my surprise he was all for it. I thought he'd protest because it would mean I'd be going out on dates with other men, but apparently Jack is in no way worried about another man being interested in a clown who says insulting things. Frankly, I'm hurt. I mean, I make some pretty impressive balloon animals. I really think he is underestimating my allure!

10 comments:

KindredSmile said...

I think at the outset, your blog would be fairly anti-climatic, cause guys will overlook a lot of crazy if you're pretty . You'd have to fug it up quite a bit to get some priceless reactions.

Amanda said...

There is this thing called http://www.crazyblinddate.com/ I've been meaning to try since my dating life sucks. I promise I will do something crazy just once and write about it in honor of you.

You can call me, 'Sir' said...

Sure, it's no big deal of a woman does this kind of thing, but if you're a guy and you show up to a blind date carrying a squirrel that's been stuffed and mounted on a hunk of the finest oak one time ... JUST ONCE ... you're red-flagged FOREVER.

UNFAIR!!!!

Lil' Woman said...

lol that would be amazing. If I wasn't with Big Man, I would def. sign up to do this! : )
You should do it and have Jack record it. Tho that would compromise this anonymous blog, dammit!

Rock Chef said...

I bet you would find guys who found it a total turn-on!

"Hey, can you do a balloon platypus? I can!"

And at what point do you stop taking notes?

"Superman boxers. Clearly a very mature guy..."

DanjerusKurves said...

Dating around here is a joke anyway. Everybody gets married right out of high school and has kids in their 20s. That takes the 20something group out of my dating range. They get divorced sometime in their 30s and quickly remarry, which takes out the 30somethings. The 40somethings are a bunch of randy midlife chimpanzees who are trying to prove something about their waning virility. The 50-60+ crowd are fat/balding/wrinkled and I'm simply not attracted to them!!!! It appears I may have traded the Rat Race for Long-Term, if not Permanent Celibacy!!

amindinmotown said...

See, I think that sounds like a fabulous idea. I'd read that blog without a doubt (especially 'cause I'm already missing your other one!).

Imagine all the free dinners you'd get, too?

Sprite said...

You should work in TV. The world needs more wacky reality TV shows!

anne said...

Brilliant. Love it!

Danielle said...

I think if you were really overt that the guys would catch on from the outset...but if you took pieces of all your ideas and spread them out it would be absolutely hilarious. Like instead of dressing up as a clown and making balloon giraffes...just make balloon animals all night. Things like that.

I love the idea though, it's brilliant. You should absolutely do it.