Monday, September 22, 2008

Take Two: When Bloggers Attack

Jill's Take

The other morning, Jack was like "hey, is your hand as long as your face? Put it up against your face to see."

Since I trust Jack (mistake #1), I did as he said, placing my palm square over my nose to see if my face was as long as my hand. Then he up and smacked my hand! Not nice, right?

Since I am not very original, I was like "Now YOU do it". I was going to smack him right back, you see. So he puts his hand up like I had just done, and I went to smack him....but before my hand got there, he moved his hand, and wouldn't you know it, I smacked gently tapped him directly on the face.

Well, that set him off. He went on and on about how violent I am, and how it hurt soooo bad, and he thinks I chipped one of his teeth.

"You could be arrested for that! That was domestic abuse!"

"Oh, stop!" I demanded, through my laughter.

"Stop? I can't stop! I'm in so much paaaaiiiin!"

"You are so dramatic."

"I think I should call the police. Or at least the paramedics!"

I maintain that I barely grazed his face, however. More of a "love-tap", if you will. He clearly was overreacting, as he is prone to do.

Jack’s Take

Have you ever told someone a joke and then had them immediately retell it back to you? Me neither. But that’s apparently how Jill’s brain works.

I played a joke on her. So then she tried to play it back on me immediately. How original, right?

The only difference in Jill’s approach was how she chose to deliver the “punch line” (no pun intended).

To recap: I patted her just hard enough to make the point “yo, genius, you shouldn’t be so gullible.”

When it came Jill’s time to pat me, however, she apparently had a flashback to that old arcade game where you would smash caterpillars with a mallet as soon as they popped up. Remember, it looked kinda like this:
In other words, Jill smashed my face like she was trying to buzz-in on the Family Feud and the question was: “Name a pet.”

I don’t want to get too dramatic, but I did have a swollen lip the next morning. And I also think I had a grey eye – not quite a black eye, but definitely something that was heading in that direction.


JenBun said...

Caterpillars??? What arcade did you go to?!?

That sounds like a poor man's Whack-A-Mole!

You can call me, 'Sir' said...

Yeah,JenBun's right. It was moles you were whacking.

I really don't get the, 'Now let ME do it! Because it'll be funny TWICE!' action on Jill's part. And why would you go along with it right up to the point of letting her pummel you with her fists of fury?

Dingo said...

Have you ever told someone a joke and then had them immediately retell it back to you? Me neither.

I'm sorry, Jill. Usually I have your back but this is just freakin' hilarious. BUT in all fairness, um, Jack? Really? You didn't see this coming?

Luvvie (aka Queen IG) said...

Jack, dont think I have no sympathy but the whole thing reads like a 3 stooges episode. And it made me cackle.

anne said...

These cute little drawings are my new favorite thing about the internet. Jack, what's the deal with the Easter bunny print on the button-down? Maybe that's the real issue here.

Ali said..., figured because you moved your hand, she would be able to stop hers moving at warp speed toward your face?

LOL - sorry, but you kind of should have expected it! Sorry about your grey eye though :)

Hollywood Sucker said...

Jill, don't feel bad. I always fall for that trick too.

Jack and Jill said...

JENBUN - THAT'S what the game is called!

SIR - He's not very bright.

DINGO - Yes, he should have known better. I couldn't agree more.

LUVVIE - Cackling? Wow, we done good!

ANNE - First I made him with heart pj's and he didn't like those so we went with bunnies. I'm not even sure he noticed the bunnies, but it's awesome, no?

ALI - :-)

HOLLYWOOD - Thanks for the backup!


pistols at dawn said...

Whack a Mole was great until I turned 11 and realized there was something else to whack that didn't require quarters in my very own room.

Sprite said...

Tricking people into hurting you - Sounds like a cry for help to me.

Jen said...

Mean, mean Jack.

I hate to say it, but you get what you ask for. . . .

sid said...

I don't think you should stand for this type of abuse Jack. Think you should leave her before it gets worse. Jill is obviously a very sick person who needs help controlling her anger.

surviving myself said...

Wow. Jill, you have some work to do before you can be a normal member of society.

amindinmotown said...

Um, every girl has fallen for this, so cut Jill some slack, jeeeez.

As for getting hit in the face, maybe Jack shouldn't have moved his hand and just played along. But nope. I think you asked for it. =P

Adorably Bitter said...

Hehe, Jack, at least you don't have to worry about dark alleys when walking out in the streets with Jill. Whoever tries to mug you will be really sorry.

Chief Rock Chef said...

Jack - you played a slapping game with someone who talked about stabbing someone in the neck because she was smoking?


There's another game where you put your hand on the table and someone stabs the table between your fingers...

KE said...

This was the other thing you were going to blog about, Jill! I forgot! I see that BOTH you and Jack are very into avatars, though.